If defending your oppressor were a paid profession, would Nigeria’s youth finally have solved unemployment—or would it still come with no job security, no future, and zero benefits?
Welcome to this week’s edition of Sarcastic Sunday with Mohammed Bello Doka, where we examine Nigeria’s political gymnastics with sarcasm, because doing otherwise will choke us to death. Literally. Emotionally. Economically.
Let us begin with the uncomfortable question nobody wants to answer honestly:
How did a generation meant to challenge power become its most enthusiastic unpaid defenders?
And more importantly, when did suffering become something to protect rather than resist?
The Warning Everyone Understood—and Ignored
Not long ago, a simple civic reminder circulated: that short-term political inducements cannot protect anyone for four years. It was clear. It was logical. It was obvious.
So why did it sound revolutionary?
Was it too much mathematics? Too much logic? Or too threatening to a culture that prefers survival today over dignity tomorrow?
Somewhere along the line, a four-year mandate began to be treated like a weekend promo. And a generation that should have known better applauded.
At what point did we decide that governance works like mobile data—expires quickly and renews painfully?
Renewed Hope or Renewed Hunger?
The current government of President Bola Tinubu insists that Nigeria is turning a corner. GDP growth figures are quoted. Inflation trends are debated. Charts are shared.
Official narratives point to GDP growth of about 3.9% in the first half of 2025, claims that inflation is easing, foreign reserves improving, and that by 2026 the economy will be “on track.”
But here is the question that refuses to disappear:
If the economy is improving, why does life feel harder for the people living inside it?
Is growth still growth if it only shows up in press releases?
Or is this one of those miracles that works better on paper than in people’s lives?
Youth by the Numbers: Unemployed, Under-Utilised, and Over-Defended
Let’s introduce numbers into the argument—since feelings are often dismissed, but statistics are harder to insult.
- A September 2025 report estimated that nearly 80 million Nigerian youths are unemployed, with millions of graduates pouring into a job market that simply cannot absorb them.
- Afrobarometer surveys consistently show that lack of jobs and economic opportunities ranks as the top concern for young Nigerians.
- In 2020, before methodology changes conveniently lowered the figures, youth unemployment was estimated at 53.4%—a number so embarrassing it later disappeared from official vocabulary.
So while policymakers insist the statistics have “improved,” one must ask:
Did unemployment reduce, or did the definition simply get tired of being honest?
Because for most young Nigerians, the grind hasn’t changed—only the language describing it has.
The Paradox of Praise: When Your Oppressor Becomes Your Social Media Job
Here lies the political paradox of the decade.
Millions of Nigerian youths wake up every day to defend leaders who have presided over their economic suffocation—online, loudly, passionately, and for free.
So let’s ask the questions that refuse to be polite:
- Why is protecting bad leadership so popular when unemployment is so high?
- Why is internet applause more visible than organised protest?
- Is defending power now the fastest-growing informal sector?
Psychologists call this cognitive dissonance—holding two conflicting beliefs at once:
“I am suffering” and “I must defend those responsible.”
Survival instincts, when mixed with fear of exclusion and hope for crumbs, create something darker: voluntary propaganda.
Instead of demanding accountability, some youths have become digital bodyguards for the status quo, clapping for policies they cannot benefit from.
And one must ask:
If defending neglect actually worked, wouldn’t things be better by now?
Inflation, Poverty, and Rising Expectations… of Nothing
Official data claims inflation dropped to around 14.45% in late 2025. But food inflation—the only inflation poor people actually feel—remains punishing.
Even if the numbers decline, reality does not.
And then there’s poverty.
An estimated 129 million Nigerians—about 60% of the population—are living in poverty.
So here is the uncomfortable arithmetic:
How does a country celebrate macroeconomic stability while the majority of its people are economically unstable?
Is this renewed hope—or expert illusionism?
Psychology of the Oppressed: Why Praise Beats Protest
Here is a dark psychological truth often buried under noise:
Oppressed groups often defend their oppressors not because they believe in them, but because they feel powerless to imagine alternatives.
This is known as system justification theory—people rationalise broken systems to reduce the anxiety of helplessness.
So when a young Nigerian defends a government that offers no jobs, no security, and no clear future, it isn’t always loyalty. It’s coping.
But once coping goes public, it becomes reinforcement.
So ask yourself:
Is this patriotism—or psychological surrender dressed in national colours?
Leadership Promises vs. Actual Lives
Government officials frequently speak about youth programmes, empowerment schemes, and future investments.
But reality remains stubborn:
- Millions remain unemployed.
- Structural education reform is absent.
- Meaningful job creation is scarce.
- Safety nets barely exist.
So the youth say one thing privately—“We want jobs, dignity, and a future.”
But do another publicly—“Protect those in power.”
And thus the cycle continues:
- Youth defend power publicly.
- Power feels untouchable.
- Power feels no urgency to change.
- Youth remain drained.
- Repeat.
So one must ask:
If loyalty changes nothing, why is it defended so fiercely?
Selling the Future, One Post at a Time
Let us address the metaphor directly: data fees.
In today’s Nigeria, loyalty travels faster online than solutions. Internet access has become the currency of political defence.
So ask yourself:
Can a retweet repair infrastructure?
Can defending power online reduce food prices?
Can applause substitute for policy?
Defending bad governance costs data.
Bad governance costs a future.
Which one is more expensive?
How Power Learns to Misbehave
Power responds to incentives.
When criticism is drowned out by praise, leaders learn a simple lesson: there are no consequences.
So consider this carefully:
If failure is rewarded with loyalty, why attempt success?
If applause is guaranteed, why bother performing?
This is not courage.
It is audacity born from impunity.
The Myth of the Reward
What do the defenders actually receive?
Visibility? Maybe.
Recognition? Occasionally.
Opportunity? Rarely.
Security? Never.
And yet the defence continues.
So here is the simplest logic test of all:
If defending power paid off, why are the defenders still struggling?
Why does survival keep masquerading as success?
Children of Tomorrow, Problems of Today
Every act of defence is inherited.
Children will not inherit explanations.
They will inherit consequences.
Weakened institutions.
Normalised hardship.
A culture where loyalty replaced expectation.
So answer this honestly:
How do you explain to your child that their future was exchanged for online relevance and temporary data?
The Rigging Argument—and the Hole in It
Some argue: “Collect the money. They will rig anyway.”
Then answer this:
If politicians can rig without you, why are they paying you?
Money follows influence.
And once you collect it, something breaks: confidence, courage, moral authority.
Once you accept crumbs, you lose the audacity to challenge the baker.
The Brutal Ending We Keep Avoiding
And here is the most disappointing truth of all:
Leaders who did not care about you when they needed your vote will not care about you after they secure power.
Those small stipends, data allowances—sometimes as little as ₦20,000—are not investments. They are expenses. And expenses stop when usefulness ends.
The data will finish.
The attention will stop.
The suffering will remain.
Some argue all politicians are the same. Perhaps.
But politicians remain the same because voters behave the same—ready to be paid, ready to defend, ready to excuse oppression.
When politicians realise that failure leads to rejection, behaviour changes.
Until then, impunity remains logical.
So the final question remains:
Is this survival—or just well-dressed surrender?
The choice, inconveniently, is still yours.
By Mohammed Bello Doka
Mohammed Bello Doka can be reached via [email protected]