Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to another rib-cracking edition of Sarcastic Sunday with Mohammed Bello Doka, where Nigerian politics writes its own comedy scripts. Today’s lecture: the People’s Democratic Party (PDP) — a party so confused it hugs its opponent by day and swears to fight him by night.
This is not opposition politics. This is romantic entanglement with your oppressor — call it Stockholm Syndrome Politics. PDP is like a battered lover telling Nigerians: “Yes, Tinubu hurts me, but only I can save you from him.”
PDP Governors as Tinubu’s Praise Singers
Take Osun State, for example. Governor Ademola Adeleke and PDP stakeholders openly endorsed Tinubu’s reelection. Adeleke’s team even declared: “We shall work for Tinubu’s victory in 2027.” Clap for them! Opposition that campaigns for the incumbent — that’s a Guinness World Record entry right there.
In Ogun, PDP Chairman Abayomi Tella didn’t bother hiding his love note. He said PDP in Ogun would support Tinubu because “Yoruba unity” matters more than opposition. Forget party lines, forget ideology — as long as it’s Yoruba, PDP becomes APC by spiritual marriage.
Then comes the Oscar-winning performance in Delta State. Governor Sheriff Oborevwori not only defected, he confessed: “We cannot work against Tinubu because he has shown us love.” Ladies and gentlemen, opposition has officially been replaced with Valentine’s Day speeches.
And in Rivers, Governor Sim Fubara, after his own political civil war, pledged “loyalty to Tinubu and Wike.” Pause for effect. How does an “opposition governor” kneel to both his political tormentor (Wike) and his supposed rival (Tinubu)? That’s not governance; that’s hostage negotiation.
Wike: The Emperor Without Sanction
But the crown jewel of PDP’s comedy hour remains Nyesom Wike. The man is still a PDP member on paper, yet in action he is Tinubu’s most trusted attack dog disguised as opposition. Wike brags about helping Tinubu win, struts around Abuja as FCT Minister, and mocks PDP openly.
And what has PDP done? Nothing. Not a suspension, not a query, not even a polite warning. Wike holds the party by the throat while dancing to Tinubu’s drumbeat. He is the landlord of PDP’s internal chaos, and every governor knows it.
If PDP cannot save itself from Wike’s iron grip, how on earth does it expect to save Nigeria from Tinubu? That’s like asking a drowning man to teach you how to swim.
Coalition or Circus?
Now, into this chaos, PDP wants to lead a coalition to unseat Tinubu in 2027. A coalition of what? Defectors? Praise singers? Governors who spend more time endorsing Tinubu than attending PDP meetings?
PDP leadership calls for unity. Dele Momodu talks of a grand alliance. Yet their house is burning, and their governors are busy fetching water — not to quench the fire, but to water Tinubu’s garden.
ADC, Labour Party and SDP must be laughing in their strategy rooms. Why would they allow PDP to “lead” a coalition when PDP itself is now a branch office of APC?
Time for the Real Men to Stand Up
It is time for the real men of PDP — Atiku Abubakar, Aminu Waziri Tambuwal, Governor Bala Mohammed, Governor Dauda Lawal Dare and others still clinging to the wreckage — to show courage and fully join forces with the wider opposition coalition. As long as they keep one leg inside PDP, Wike remains useful to Tinubu as his Trojan horse, and the ruling party will continue to milk that internal confusion. Like the saying goes, “you cannot fight the lion while living in his den.”
The bitter truth is this: Wike’s power is not in himself but in PDP’s refusal to walk away from him. The moment Tinubu realizes that PDP is finished and every serious contender has joined a new coalition, Wike becomes irrelevant overnight — a noisy sidekick no longer needed. As Nigerians would say, “when the masquerade has no audience, it retires to the bush.” If PDP’s real opposition heavyweights want to stop being props in Tinubu’s theatre, they must leave the stage entirely and let Wike and Tinubu be seen for what they are: partners in deception.
Is the Opposition Watching or Just Napping?
One wonders if the opposition is even taking notes as APC writes its own playbook for authoritarianism. While PDP dabbles in internal romance with Tinubu and Wike plays the court jester, APC is busy handing governors automatic tickets and shutting the doors on any meaningful contest. Just last week, Engr. Kayode Ojo publicly accused the APC National Secretary of saying that purchasing the primary election form in Ekiti is a waste of resources because “there is no vacancy in Government House.” Let that sink in: a National Secretary of a ruling party openly declaring democracy optional, while the country watches.
And it’s not just Ekiti. Across multiple states, APC is pre-selecting candidates, likely ensuring decampee governors retain their seats without even pretending to hold primaries. At the national level, the pattern is the same — a tightly controlled, winner-takes-all machine designed to crush any independent thought. Meanwhile, the opposition risks wasting time squabbling over ego and loyalty instead of recruiting leaders who can truly save Nigerians from this looming authoritarian disaster. Tinubu’s second term must be seen for what it is: an existential threat to every strongman, governor, and political heavyweight who dares to think independently. The opposition’s task is simple: wake up, organize, and prioritize Nigeria over personal ambition — or watch Tinubu and his cronies turn the country into a playground of impunity.
The Brutal Truth
So, let’s not sugarcoat it: PDP is no longer an opposition party. It is a confused congregation of divided loyalties, where half the members are Tinubu’s undercover campaigners and the other half are too scared of Wike to speak.
This is why Nigerians no longer take PDP’s sermons seriously. You cannot claim to be the Messiah of the opposition while kneeling before the same man you promise to dethrone. That is not strategy — that is delusion on steroids.
The Final Sermon
So, here is the closing gospel for this Sunday: PDP itself needs salvation. Until it disciplines its Tinubu-worshipping governors, frees itself from Wike’s wicked grip, and decides whether it is an opposition party or Tinubu’s fan club, it has no business pretending to lead a coalition.
Reality check: a party that cannot save itself has no chance of saving Nigeria. PDP should face the truth, drop the self-deception, and admit it has become Tinubu’s sidekick, not his challenger.
And that, dear Nigerians, is your Sunday sermon on How to Love Your Oppressor.